Match dating = Matchmaking?

 I recently went with a couple of single friends along to a speed dating event that Match.com was holding locally.  Here is our review:-

Firstly we were disappointed that it wasn’t a genuine speed dating event as we sat down at a table and were chatted up by a variety of candidates that weren’t moved on at all so we had to try to extricate ourselves from the conversation which proved difficult and eventually we even had to relinquish our seats in order to escape from one poor fellow.

To follow are some anecdotes about some of the more interesting men we spoke to –

The Anorak  

A guy who resembled the television character Mr Bean approached us wearing an anorak zipped up to just under his chin.  He walked with his arms permanently placed static vertically at his side.  Bless him he was clueless about human interaction, facial expressions and body language.

He was clearly interested in my friend and why wouldn’t he be?  She’s tall blonde gorgeous and model like.  He sat himself down next to her placing his head onto his hand with elbow on the table he stared at her for far longer than was comfortable.

My friend decided to try to invent a made up job to try to get him to lose interest in her.  She said she was a hair dresser, twirled her hair and giggled a lot.  It seemed to be working and he began to lose interest turning instead to talk to me.  My friend Janine said “ask Scarlett what she does for a living and I thought think of something boring…

But then I’ve no idea why but the first thing that popped out was that I was a stunt double!  Where that came from I have no idea?  Why I thought that was boring I don’t know?

Anyway he believed me and began to show a real interest in knowing more.  He asked me whom I was stunt double for and the story unfolded.  I’m stunt double for Helena Bonham-Carter I explained and unfortunately work has dried up a bit since the finish of the Harry Potter films.  I’m really not as convincing a liar as I am a storyteller so I began giggling as I told the story and my friend then interjected by explaining that’s how we met as she was hairdresser for Harry Potter.

Poor guy he was convinced despite my giggles that I was telling the truth and asked for tales of near misses.  I think explained how a stunt had gone wrong and went into so much detail he believed me.  Thank God I read and watched the Harry Potter series!

He then started to talk to us about how much he loved walking in Cumbria and being in the middle of  nowhere in the hills.  Then he asked me whether I was familiar with weapons in my role as a stunt double.  I said that I was and joked not to mess with me if I was packing 😉  He then said he meant crossbows and was an avid collector. OMG!

Either he was more clued up than we thought and had a sense of humour to play the “I’m a serial killer” card or maybe he was one and we really did escape when we moved tables?  What do you think?